Audible August

Audible August....


Do you ever wonder if anyone hears you? Like, really hears you? The kind of listening that takes all their brain power to hear what you are saying? They don't.


Unless you are telling a shit joke. And by shit joke, I do not mean the kind of joke that's just shitty. I mean an actual joke that ends up with, "And then I took a dump in her sink..." Doesn't even matter what the set up is, you laughed at the "And then I took a dump in her sink". Trust me, you laughed. I heard it from here.

Growing up in a world where everything related to taking a dump is hilarious, is kinda gross to me. I cringe the moment a relative starts talking about medical procedures or fiber because I know that conversation about how many times a day they move their bowels will be coming out, pun intended.

America is a highly educated country. Millions of immigrants try to break into our realm just to utilize our educational system. Yet, the biggest laughs at a comedy club these days are jokes about shit. Shit stains. Taking a dump. Dropping off the kids. Looking for diamonds. Anything and everything that doesn't have to deal with shit, now does. Even the Presidential race is shit, but that's a different story.

As someone who is just trying to find her niche in the comedy world, I refuse to tell a shit joke. I will write one for other comedians, but if shit comes out of my mouth then I know I've sold out to get a quick laugh.

It's not about the quickies. A Comedian once gave me this advice, "Set up, Punchline. Set up. Punchline. No one has the attention span to hear anyone talk longer than that anymore." Well, I guess all those drugs in the 80's did their job? Hah!

Personally, I think a comedy show should be more than just getting the jokes out and making a person laugh. "Hickory Dickory Dock." We all know who said that, right? That's what it's about. Making something you say, YOURS, and having everyone know it's YOURS. That way if I go on stage saying, "Hickory Dickory Dock", you'll know I'm either doing a very shitty Andrew Dice Clay impression or stealing his material. Kinda shitty to steal a comic's signature jokes, don't you think?

Anyhow, now that I figured out what the password was to this site there will be more amazing blogs, not like this one, it's blows shit.

It's been awhile. And I'm sure I am the only one who noticed. ;)

Coming soon is a new website.

New additions to the website to include, a calendar of events, comedian interviews, pictures, and much much more.

Life goes on and so does the Laughter.

NJ Funny Pages Comedian of the Month for July: Evan Marz

As a comedy enthusiast, it is my extreme pleasure to introduce NJ Funny Pages fans and followers to great up and coming comedians from the Tri-State Area. This month NJFP would like to introduce you to:

                                      EVAN MARZ, Philly Area

NJFP caught up with Comedian Evan Marz at his last performance at the Quick Chek in Burlington, NJ. It was a hot saucy night and maybe about 15 people showed up to support him as he debuted as the next Manager of the Month at Quick Chek. As he accepted that honor, he was bestoted with another, Comedian of the Month! NJFP was lucky to get five minutes with Evan Marz, and this is what we asked him.

Interview with Comedian/Author Evan Marz.

1. How did you get involved in Stand Up Comedy? Did you see it as a calling like most comedians? 

A call to laughter, if you will?

After disappointing my parents by going to college and majoring in a useless profession, I decided to further their humiliation and tell them "I'm coming out tonight, I am going to be a Stand Up Comic". I saw it more as a call to disappoint my parents and gain access to depressed horny girls everywhere. 

2. As the author of Dirty Sanchez Nation, you must be particularly proud of the success to date. What is your favorite part of the book and why? Favorite Page?

My favorite part of the book is your cash receipt. So, keep buying it! www.dirtysancheznation.com

My favorite page is the author page, I like to see my name so prominent.

3. You also produce your own "Get Offended" Comedy shows/contests, is that where your true passion for comedy is, or just want to help offend America, specifically, Philly? When is your next show? And How can comedians get on it!

Yes and No. I was at a comedy club, won't name names but it was a dirty hole in the wall and the girls had dirty holes too. I decided I hated everything about it including the patrons who would engagingly laugh at you like your hilarious or something. Awful! I wanted to offend someone and something so I created my own shows. I don't know when the next one is and "They know how to get on it. *wink* *wink*"

4. Who is your comedic role model, or life role model and why?

Myself, Why not? I am awesome and I have a few sexy pussies.

5. Would you identify more so as the "bad boy" of comedy or a "good guy" of comedy? Why do you think that?

I think this question sucks. I am not a boy, and I've never been good.

6. Right or Lefty? And we aren't asking about your penmanship!

*wink* *wink* ask my pussy cat she watches.

7. Where can people find out MORE about you?

Dirty Sanchez Nation and facebook, Evan Marz

*This interview was completely fabrication and nothing in this is true. If any of the stories seems to resemble any true act, it is merely a joke. Get over it. No one cares enough to repeat your lame ass stories*

NJFP actually reached out to Evan Marz, and he replied with, "Go F' yourself with your free promotions of comedy and your stupid website" - We <3 you too, Evan. Go Check out his comedy someplace near you.

April Showers Bring "Heavy Metal Meets Heavy Comedy" to Times Sqaure Arts Center 4/29

Cringe Humor's Cluster F Radio Presents Heavy Comedy Meets Heavy Metal

Watch 7 comics battle to win "Cluster F*ck Radio's Cringiest Comic Contest"

The show will be headlined by That Metal Show host and Cringe Humor favorite Jim Florentine

Also featuring Dante Nero from Comedy Central's Live @ The El Rey and the major motion picture Fighting

And one of NYC's best metal bands "The Deadlyz" will also be performing

Great night of hardcore comedy and heavy metal music!!


For tickets, order online now:

http://www.ticketweb.com/t3/sale/SaleEventDetail?dispatch=loadSelectionData&eventId=3633415

Admission: $20 at the door $15 in advance +2 drink min

Time: Doors open 7pm, show starts 8pm

Venue: Times Square Arts Center

303 West 42nd Street
New York, NY 10036
(212) 586-7829

Dreary December's Douchebags...

It's been awhile since we've updated this thing. NJ Funny Pages had to take a small hiatus from going forward due to some medical issues with our relatives. (Gosh, wouldn't it be easier if we could just strangle them and no one would be the wiser? Probably, the worst joke ever right now, RIP Relatives. Love.)

Regardless, 2011 is going to be a year of new changes for NJ Funny Pages. We are going to re-do our website, because let's face it, it looks like a 3 year old just turning on a computer for the first time designed our website. I know, I know! I just haven't had the time to dedicate to it fully with complete concentration.

Our Facebook Fan Page has broke 500 people! That's exciting for us, because we were really just a "Dollar and a Dream" kinda thing and "oh damn, oh hot slam", we are almost infamous! So, keep spreading us around to your family and friends on facebook, "We are like an infectious disease, like, that you actually want!".

So, Keep on a look out for an updated website, some new and improved commentary, and our 2011 First Comedian Interview. Any ideas which Jersey Comedian should get interviewed first? Email us at njfunnypages@njfunnypages.com

We would like to wish everyone out there a "Healthy, Wealthy, Sexy Holidays, and Laughter all New Year!" Remember to "Live, Love, and Laugh Often".

As the days go by...

It's been a great giggle fest at NJ Funny Pages.com - We spent the summer learning the ins and the outs of the NJ Comedy scene. This fall we are gearing up launch our new website , www.njfunnypages.com. Tonight, we are tackling the small stuff, like adding the blog to the website and updating our New Calendar so that our fans and friends can see where the Jersey Comedians are performing their shows.

We are currently taking suggestions on who you would like to see as our First Featured Comedian Interview...Granted, we are only taking suggestions and we will or may have already picked out the first ten! Are you on that list? Want to be? Email us your information at njfunnypages@njfunnypages.com today!

NJ Funny Pages

Sometimes you wake up with a goal and a dream, and a little steam. Well, this is a goal and a dream that two women who love to laugh had at the same time and then, NJ Funny Pages was born.

Steaming on and two months later, we have developed our love to laugh and our want and need to see our friend's goals and dreams come true into a comedy promotional business. We want to help the comedy circuit "bring laughter back". We developed a facebook group to help promote favorite comedians, and even developed a website (which is in developement stages).

So the goal and the dreams still steams on...

Until next time, enjoy your laughter.

Love, Live, and Laugh A-lot!